I can’t tell if it was the shortened work week or if this week in particular was rough. For the most of it, my mind and body fought an unknown battle. I was in a constant ‘fight or flight’ mode. I don’t mean figuratively–I mean quite literally. As time progressed, I used the same tactics for my panic attacks and they somehow failed to tame my wild mind. Something is just not right in the air and the right side of my brain is not having it.
There are certain things in this life that you can try and prepare for–tests, engagements, meetings. How do you prepare for the unknown? Let me phrase it this way, how to do you get comfortable with not knowing?
All my life, I have been risk averse. My actions always followed the logic–how can you compete with that? How can you argue with facts and stats? The last decade of my life, I’ve been following my mind and siding with what was the most logical choice for me and my family. I’m pretty sure my parents have always made the most sound decisions though it might be due to the fact that they are immigrants. You can’t make a life for yourself, off of hopes and dreams…
This past Monday, I wrote about social media and the way it can impact your mind over time. Looking at other’s posts daily is inviting their personalities into your environment. If you’re like me, it can take a toll on your mental state when you are constantly viewing people’s highs and lows. In addition to the unnecessary emotional baggage, it can lead you comparing your life with others. It’s in our social nature–it’s difficult to break the laws of human nature.
I’ve used social media as a quick dopamine hit. When I know there’s something I need to do, and I envision it being difficult, I quickly unlock my phone and peruse Insta and Twitter, closing and switching back and forth. Nothing good comes out of looking at those sites, mind you. The only thing that’s delayed is thought of going through something potentially difficult (which in the long run, isn’t very difficult at all). It’s a mind game, I tell you!
Ironically, I did come across something that resonated with me the other day. I must apologize if you don’t believe in god or a higher power. I grew up with the thought of faith and being good or going to purgatory. It’ll take YEARS for it to be undone, but that is for another time and blog. “God placed the best things in life on the other side of terror.” I mentioned this to a group of women that I value deeply, and the amount of eye rolling I received was incredible. Thought for a second, I did feel foolish because to them it was just another ‘churchy’ quote, but to me, it was the start of possibilities.
God placed the best things in life on the other side of terror.
Will Smith
If everything was easy, wouldn’t everyone be doing those things? If life wasn’t difficult, what kind of life would it be? When you have nothing to risk and all to gain, the answer is simple. There’s no need to incorporate logic–or at least to me it was an easy decision. As you progress in life, and as you gain–whether it’s in your finances, career, education–you become a bit more disinclined to risk. You don’t want to lose anything that you’ve gained over the years. All your hard work–poof! Seems like a bad time.
<deep breath>
Sometimes you need to take a leap of faith, trust that you have the abilities you need to succeed, and know that you can learn anything. The greater the risk, the greater the reward, right?
I normally don’t prose questions in my blog, but I value internet interaction. My blogs are mostly thought provoking and–while it may not be too uplifting at times–positive. So here goes:
What type of decisions have you made that was more risky? Did you learn anything from those situations? Any lessons learned? If you feel inclined, please leave a comment below. I’d love to converse!
KatD0m 